Question
Why do Latino families bring so many people to meetings?
Answer
In regards to family orientation, we are very close-knit. The emphasis is on the well-being of the whole family. It is also important to understand here that sometimes we have families that are not family. For example, I have an aunt and when I was 12 years old I asked my mother how she was my aunt if my mother had no siblings. It took me 12 years to realize that. We adopt people so they become our psychological family. It's important that you know that because, in the United States, the family orientation is basically the immediate family, while in the Latino family, not only do several generations live together, but grandparents are extremely important and are key players in raising the children. Also, the extended family might include grandparents, aunts, uncles, nieces, and nephews. As I said, part of their family may not be family but acts as family given that psychological role. So it's not only the blood family, the legal family but also the psychological family. Why is that important? Because children in the United States that are from immigrant families might have lost their aunts, uncles, and nieces, and they are adopting next-door neighbors as an aunt or as a cousin. Those people will have authority over them, and they might need to be included in family gatherings or events at the school and in the decision-making process at the school about the child. Families are group-oriented.
All families will be involved in decision-making. That's a very different scenario from the main culture in the US. I've been in many IEP meetings where the parents brought many people to the meeting. There were parents, grandparents, a real aunt, and the next-door neighbor which is an aunt. We have to navigate all those relationships. You could tell that the teachers were not comfortable with that. At some point I had to say, this is their family, even though some were the psychological family. They are not going to make decisions that affect their kids without their family support. If you're really a good family member you will be there when the kids need you, like in family meetings, parties, and celebrations at school. We'll be there, so make sure that when you open your event, you have extra seats for the people that are going to come with the Latino family. Expect that in your meetings you're going to have more people than you usually expect. You might not have just mom and dad. You might have the mom, grandparents, and the next-door neighbor.
This Ask the Expert is an edited excerpt from the course, Cultural Awareness in Working with Families, by Anarella Cellitti, PhD.
