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What is cognitive reframing when it comes to the psychology of victims/survivors of relationship violence?

Wind Goodfriend, PhD, MS, BA

September 7, 2023

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Question

What is cognitive reframing when it comes to the psychology of victims/survivors of relationship violence?

Answer

Cognitive reframing refers to the phenomenon where victims/survivors of relationship violence may alter their perception or understanding of abusive incidents as a coping mechanism. This ties into theories like cognitive dissonance, where individuals feel compelled to resolve inconsistencies between their attitudes and behaviors.

For victims/survivors who cannot immediately leave an abusive relationship, reframing the situation can help reduce the discrepancy between believing relationship violence is unacceptable but continuing to stay with an abusive partner. Their perspective may shift in ways that an objective outsider would not view as accurate or rational.

Research has found patterns of cognitive reframing among victims/survivors, including:

  • Self-blame - Incorporating the abuser's narrative that the violence is the victim's fault
  • Uncontrollable personality - Attributing abuse to factors like alcoholism or PTSD rather than the perpetrator
  • "For better or worse" - Viewing leaving as violating religious vows
  • Redefining violence - Narrowly defining "abuse" so their experience does not qualify

This reframing allows victims/survivors to cope while gathering resources to eventually leave. However, it risks enabling the perpetrator's manipulation. Understanding cognitive reframing provides insight into victims'/survivors' psychology and emphasizes the importance of honoring their perspectives when providing support.

This Ask the Expert is an excerpt from the course, Relationship Violence and Research, presented by Wind Goodfriend, PhD, MS, BA.


wind goodfriend

Wind Goodfriend, PhD, MS, BA

Wind Goodfriend, PhD, is a full professor of psychology at Buena Vista University in Storm Lake, Iowa. She earned her bachelor’s degree at Buena Vista University, then her Master’s and PhD in social psychology from Purdue University. Dr. Goodfriend has won the “Faculty of the Year” award at BVU several times, and two of her textbooks won the “Most Promising Book of the Year” award by the Textbook and Academic Authors Association. She has written several peer-reviewed articles about the psychology of relationship violence, as well as the recent book “Entrapment, Escape, and Elevation From Relationship Violence” (Cambridge University Press).


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