Question
What are common myths about grief support for secular clients?
Answer
Several myths persist regarding grief support, particularly for secular clients. One common misconception is that everyone finds comfort in afterlife beliefs; in reality, many individuals draw solace from other sources, and clinicians can help clients explore and nurture these alternatives. Another myth is that rituals must be religious to be healing, but secular rituals and practices can also provide significant comfort and reinforce core values, beliefs, and identity. Additionally, the belief that a lack of faith equates to a lack of meaning is unfounded and contributes to stigma against secular clients. Secular individuals can and do find deep meaning in life outside of religious frameworks.
Clinicians should also recognize that spiritual language is not neutral; it can be loaded or even triggering, especially for those with a history of religious trauma. Well-intentioned phrases like "I'll pray for you" or "let me know if you need anything" may not resonate with secular clients and can feel isolating or unhelpful. Instead, clinicians should seek out language and support strategies that are inclusive, practical, and sensitive to the client's worldview, using resources that offer alternative approaches to comfort and care.
This Ask the Expert is an edited excerpt from the course, ‘Agnostics and Atheists- Considerations for Grief Counseling,’ presented by Ashley McLimans, MS, LMHCP.
